Sunday, September 11, 2011

for beth.

I am blessed for many, many reasons. I have so many people in my life that have shaped me and molded me into who I am and whom I love dearly. However, there is one lady in particular who I'm thinking of this evening. You see, I came to the realization this past year that I definitely do not express to those around me just how much they really mean to me. I feel it so deeply and just assumed that of course they knew...but, how can they when I don't actually say it. Duh. So, I'd like to make sure that this wonderful woman knows exactly how I feel and that there is never any doubt...ever.

Dearest Beth,
     As I sit here this evening, you have really been on my heart and I realized that I truly have not told you just how much you mean to me. I've never told you how what you've done, what you've not done, and what you've been has truly shaped my life. In all the years I've known you, since you came into our family, you have never once gotten involved in the drama and ridiculousness of things that have happened. You've taught me that it really is ok to let the drama pass by and just smile. You have never questioned (at least, not out loud...and you'll never know just how much that's meant to me) the decisions that I've made, you've just quietly stood by and assured me that you supported me no matter what I chose to do. Through all the terrible things that come with a broken family, you came in and did not ebb and flow with the sea of emotions all around you, but were this amazing rock who was just still and solid through it all. At least, that's what I saw and I have not seen this very often in my life. I can't imagine how hard it's been for you, but I want you to know, now that I'm an adult (and because it's so much easier for me to write out what I feel) I truly, deeply, appreciate you more than you'll ever know and far more than I'll ever be able to capture with words. I absolutely love being around you, I love talking to you, mostly because you never demand anything of me. You never try to drag things out of me, or come up with reasons why I do what I do, or manipulate me into telling you things...You just let me be and because of my personality this makes me want to be around you all the more and actually share what's going on in my life. Thank you for that, for this also has been very rare. And, when I'm not around you, I really miss you...a lot. I really, really do. And, do you know how proud it makes me when you introduce me as your daughter? Maybe you've never thought about it, but it means SO much to me:-) I love the fact that I'm your daughter. Trust me when I say, if you had had children of your own, they could not love or admire you more than I do. So, thank you. Thank you for being you, for loving me and being my friend, and for being the most perfect example of a stepmom. Yeah, you rock the whole stepmom thing! I love you.

"An excellent wife, who can find? For her worth is far above jewels...Her children rise up and bless her; Her husband also,and he praises her, saying:"Many daughters have done nobly, But you excel them all."    -Proverbs 31:10, 28, 29

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